


After Winter

by soohyukin



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Blood, Character Death, Curses, Death, Dialogue Heavy, Heavy Angst, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:09:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29398164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soohyukin/pseuds/soohyukin
Summary: I’ve loved you for 10 years and counting, I wished you would be my today and all of my tomorrows but what went wrong?
Kudos: 5





	After Winter

Jeonghan stepped out of the hospital doors, it was cold and all he could see was the beauty of the white winter snow. The breeze was just perfect, it was his favorite season of all but for some reason he felt so empty and lonely. He grabbed his phone from his pocket and dialed Seungcheol’s number. 

“The number you have dialed is currently busy please try again later.” the voice said. He’s still not picking up, Jeonghan thought. He’s been busy with work that he never goes home anymore, it’s been weeks since he saw him and Jeonghan has finally accepted that their love will never be the same anymore. It’s been 10 years but as each year passed by, their love gradually faded and he was losing hope. One more time, Jeonghan dialed the number again and waited for him to pick up. 

He got on the bus, still clutching to his phone and waiting. Please pick up. I miss you. Don’t you miss me anymore? At the last ring, Seungcheol finally picked up the call, his voice sounded irritated. 

Seungcheol shushed his partner, he was in bed with another man, “What’s wrong?” he asked Jeonghan through the call. 

“It’s the first winter, are you coming home? I could cook us some yeot,” Jeonghan was holding back his tears, “You’re barely home anymore, I miss you.” (A/N: Yeot is considered a lucky food from South Korea)  
“I’m busy, I’ll be working overtime, don’t wait for me. I’ll ask someone to get you yeot. Okay? I’m hanging up.” He abruptly ended the call. 

Jeonghan’s tears streamed down his pale face, he’d always keep up with Seungcheol’s acts but why can’t he even come home for once? I won’t make it next winter, Seungcheol.  
The doorbell rang and Jeonghan met with Seungcheol’s assistant, “Mr. Yoon, I’ve brought your yeot.” he smiled at him.  
“You don’t have to do this, you should focus at work,” Jeonghan replied.  
“I’d rather do this than arrange mountains of paperwork, Sir.” He chuckled.  
“Thank you, you should get going. It's going to snow a lot today.” Jeonghan parted ways with him and silently ate the yeot by himself. He remembers the days wherein Seungcheol and he would always wait for the first winter and have a warm bowl of soup paired with delicious yeot, it doesn’t have to be anything special but Seungcheol loves it when Jeonghan would make him one. Who knew I’d end with such illness, I gave all my luck to you. Jeonghan tried to finish his food but he had no appetite at all. He was deep in thought when he received a sudden call from his doctor, Dr. Hong, “Jeonghan? Have you thought about getting treatment? It’s much better to start your chemotherapy.”

“Please give me more time to think about it,” he answered. He didn’t have any problem with money but deep down he believes that he didn’t deserve to get any treatment. Just like their love, it doesn’t deserve anymore chances. 

____________________________________________________________________________

“Jeonghan, is there any problem with money that’s why you couldn’t take the treatment?” His doctor asked. Jeonghan nodded in disagreement, money was never the problem. 

“I heard how it would hurt and as you can see Dr. Hong, I’m all alone and I don’t think I would be able to make it, I don’t want to suffer any hardships alone,” he looked down at his fidgeting hand, he doesn’t have Seungcheol with him anymore, “Please prescribe me medicines, I’d rather take that than do the treatment, please.” 

Dr. Hong sighed, he noticed how he was always alone whenever he did his checkups. How painful was it to sit alone in the corridors of the hospital, slowly awaiting your death, “Jeonghan, I am your doctor. Whatever happens, I will be with you, so please think about it. We all deserve a second chance in life.”

Jeonghan smiled at him, “Alright. I’ll think about it. Thank you.” Before leaving, Dr. Hong grabbed his wrist and handed him a simple beaded bracelet with a smiling face on it, “You deserve a chance. Please keep it.” 

The ride home was quiet, the bracelet fit perfectly on his wrist like it was made for him. “You deserve a chance.” Dr. Hong’s words echoed through him, it wasn’t a question of deserving but more of wanting, does Jeonghan want another chance? What would he do if he was given another chance in life? Deep in thoughts, he felt his eyelids gave away and he quietly slept in their coach, dreaming of all the possibilities that he could have if he was able to restart his life. 

After a while, he heard the doors of his home, Seungcheol was home.  
“Han, what are you doing there?! You scared me,” Seungcheol slashed out. It’s okay, he must be tired from work, Jeonghan tried to understand him.  
“I fell asleep and just woke up, I’m sorry.”  
Seungcheol sighed and went up to him but Jeonghan quickly stood up and headed to their room, completely avoiding him. That’s unlike him, Seungcheol thought. He washed up and went to bed with him, hinting of wanting to, “Cheol, I’m tired. Let’s not do it.” 

“Don’t you miss me? I’ve been gone for so long and this is how you act,”  
I don’t want to be touched by you.  
“You seem thinner, have you been eating?” Seungcheol touched his frail body, his bones were sticking out and he looked disgusting to look at.  
Jeonghan buried himself with the blankets, “I lost my appetite because I was sick, let’s not do it.”  
“Fine.”

He succumbed to his cries and looked at him, he was fast asleep and in times like this, Jeonghan had hoped that maybe they’d go back but forcing yourself to believe will make you lose yourself. He snuggled to his chest, hearing his heartbeat but not for him, I don’t care how much you hurt me as long as you come back home. But Cheol, I only have a few months left, please don’t make me leave you. Please let me stay with you until my very last breath.

How many years has it been? 10 years have passed and I stayed with you till the very end. I gave up everything for you, to go to my chosen university but I decided to apply to the same university with you, to fulfill my dream job but didn’t because you didn’t want me to. I did everything you wanted but why wasn’t it enough for you? Was I useless from the very start? I was with you through your hardships but why can’t you be there for mine? I chose this path. I chose this path for you, not with you.  
____________________________________________________________________________

“Why are you up so early?” Seungcheol clinged to him. Jeonghan was making him breakfast, he might fool around but he did miss him. “I got used to waking up early.” The glint of Jeonghan’s bracelet caught Seungcheol off guard, “Where did you get this?” he grabbed his wrist and he was starting to bruise from the tightness. 

“It was just a gift,” I shouldn’t have worn it. He tightened the grip even more and it was starting to hurt, “Cheol, please let me go. It hurts.”  
Seungcheol argued, “Who gave it to you?”  
“It was just from a friend. What’s wrong with that?!”  
“Everything!” 

He never snapped at him for sleeping with other men and women but he’s mad that someone gave him a silly bracelet? Jeonghan ripped out the bracelet and the beads bounced off the ground. “There, happy?” Jeonghan glared at him but that made Seungcheol even more furious, he raised his hand and stopped midway. 

“Just for a bracelet given to me by my friend, you’re going to slap me?” He didn’t mean to cry but all of the pain he was holding in was too much, “Get out. Get out of my sight.”  
Seungcheol left and he immediately broke down, trying to find all the beads that had bounced off. It was just a silly bracelet but how come he’s crying over it? Was it because he held it on for he believed it was his fate of having a second chance? It’s all over the house now, broken and unable to be fixed, just like him. He ripped it apart just like his second chance in living. 

Following his efforts in finding every bead, he tried to connect each one again but it didn’t look like what it was before. Dr. Hong would be upset when he sees me not wearing the bracelet but I don’t know if it’s a good idea to wear it looking like this. He suspired from the distraught bracelet and headed to his checkup. 

“Dr. Hong,” he gently knocked at his door, “I’m here to collect my medicine.”  
Dr. Hong smiled at him, his eyes darting quickly to his wrists to find if he was wearing the bracelet he gave him but to his dismay, it looked like it was torn to pieces. “I was pretty sure that the bracelet I gave you wasn’t like that,” he pointed. 

Jeonghan quickly hid the bracelet, “I’m sorry. I accidentally broke it and tried to fix it but I guess you noticed how it wasn’t like it before,” He lowered his head, full of shame, “Is there anything you would like? I could treat you for lunch so you won’t feel bad.”

Dr. Hong leaned on his table and crossed his arms, “I’d much prefer if you go ahead and do your treatment, Jeonghan. I’d rather want that than some lunch.” He was always like this to him, he’s too caring and too kind but that’s how doctors are supposed to be, right? He felt bad that he didn’t want to do his treatment but Dr. Hong has been convincing him that he does deserve it. I wish you would wish that I deserve to live, Seungcheol. 

With his eyes glued to the floor, he answered, “Dr. Hong. Please give me more time.”  
“Jeonghan, how long should I wait for you to say yes? Do you know how much I’ve been working hard for you? Do you know how much I’ve been searching for your bone marrow transplant? Jeonghan, please? Think about it,” he didn’t mean to throw an outburst but it was the first time that he encountered a patient so stubborn of treatments, “Let’s go get your medicine and I’ll drop you home.” 

____________________________________________________________________________

It was a quiet ride home and the snow was slowly falling, Jeonghan would never get tired of it, “You could drop me off here, thank you Dr. Hong, I’ll treat you next time,” he smiled.  
“Next time? I’m hoping that means you’ll live long, Jeonghan. Please consider your health, I’ll be here for you.” They bid farewell and Jeonghan proceeded inside their house. 

The doors bust open and Seungcheol was screaming yet again, “Jeonghan, who was the guy that sent you back home?!” Here we go again. 

“It was just my doctor, I went to the hospital to get my medicine,” he replied blatantly.  
“Medicine? Where is it then?” Seungcheol was raging, he could feel his blood boil and his head was filled with thoughts of Jeonghan cheating with the so-called doctor.  
Jeonghan scanned the room, “I must have left it in the car. Don’t worry, he’s too good for me, he won’t date someone like me,” he answered and still not looking at his eyes. 

“I was gone for a short while and I see you running off with some man? Have you been that lonely that you cling to another asshole?!”  
“You were never here so you won’t notice how lonely I am,” Jeonghan looked at him dead in the eyes and smirked to which Seungcheol replied with a heavy slap at his cheek. He finally did it. 

Seungcheol looked at his red cheek, “I told you to stop pushing me, look what you’ve done.” So it was my fault for getting slapped? Jeonghan’s tears were building up but he didn’t want to show any weakness. He was tired and was about to die, he couldn't keep up with Seungcheol anymore. The man he has loved for 10 years has already left and died, the man standing in front of him was a stranger and nothing would come good if he decided to keep on hoping. He placed his palm over the burning cheek, it stinged and it felt like it was on fire, he really has lost it. 

“Let’s break up.”  
“I don’t want to.”  
“I don’t need your opinion, Cheol. I’m tired of keeping up with your bullshit. I’m tired of waiting for you. I’m tired of hoping. We need space, so please let me go.” Jeonghan gritted his teeth, does he have to beg for him to be finally free?  
“Han, just go to bed. We’ll be fine by tomorrow.” Seungcheol commanded. He glanced at him and could see the flow of the blood coming out of his nose, Jeonghan quickly wiped it and ran to the bathroom. Seungcheol was banging at the door but his mind went completely blank, he can’t know. 

He took his phone out and texted Dr. Hong, “I’ll proceed with the chemotherapy.” Seungcheol’s knocks quiet down and Jeonghan’s nose stopped bleeding, he peeked outside the bathroom door and could see that he was nowhere near sight. He must be sleeping already. He quickly grabbed a new pair of pajamas from his closet and slid at Seungcheol’s arms. He wished he could stay like this, it was warm and no harm would ever come to him, he admired his beauty for quite some time for he knows he won’t be able to see him anymore. He cupped his cheeks, he surely will miss his dimples. I hope you won’t regret everything you’ve done to me once I’m gone. You’re about to lose me and you don’t know. 

The sunlight was beaming through the window, it was too bright but it was the first time that Jeonghan had seen the sun shine so bright, “Let’s go eat breakfast,” Seungcheol came to their room with a gentle smile unlike his tantrum yesterday. It was the first time in forever that Seungcheol made breakfast for him, it makes him sick that he still missed this. 

“Cheol? Where’s your ring?” Jeonghan noticed, it made his heart ache.  
Seungcheol looked at his hand, “I must have misplaced it, I’ll look for it, don’t worry.” Did I lose it at Jihoon’s place? Fuck. 

“It’s okay, it was a cheap ring anyways. Eat up,” he reassured him. You’ll lose me too, don’t worry.  
“Shouldn’t you be eating more? You’re starting to lose more weight as days pass by,” Seungcheol replied.  
“I’ll be okay, Cheol.” he smiled forcefully. 

Seungcheol left for work and Jeonghan was alone once more, the house was quiet and he hoped it would stay like that for a while. He stared at the silver ring sitting on his finger, he got them for Seungcheol’s birthday and it cost a lot back in the time when he was barely surviving. He called Dr. Hong and scheduled for another checkup, it was getting worse as time passed by. 

“Your first chemo will be by tomorrow morning,” Dr. Hong announced, “I’m really happy that you changed your mind, Jeonghan. I’ll do my best to get you treated.”  
“Thank y-,” a sudden call from Jeonghan cut him off, “Excuse me, I’ll just take this call,” he went out and answered Seungcheol’s call.

Dr. Hong watched him go back to the room, his face suddenly shifted. Did he have an argument? “Jeonghan, do you have a lover?” He asked abruptly. Jeonghan’s face filled with panic but confessed, “Yes,” I think. 

“Don’t you think it would be better to tell them? At least you won’t feel alone during the process, it will be hard on you.” Dr. Hong suggested  
“I don’t want to make them sad, plus, I already have you during the process. I’ll be okay.” Jeonghan said, making Dr. Hong blush.  
“Come back tomorrow for your chemotherapy, okay? You can go home and rest.” 

____________________________________________________________________________

Jeonghan had barely any strength left after his chemotherapy, “Why didn’t you tell me it was going to hurt this much?” he weakly said, his legs were about to give up but Dr. Hong managed to catch him. 

“Let’s get you to the bed first, you did well today.” Dr. Hong helped him, he could feel the bones of Jeonghan’s body, he’s growing thinner and weaker by day. He carefully laid him on the bed, “It’s cold,” he could barely muster to say. 

Jeonghan’s body kept on shivering, “You should stay at the hospital first Jeonghan, you can barely go home at this point.”  
“I can’t, I have to go home or else.”  
“Or else what?” Dr. Hong asked but Jeonghan has drifted into slumber. And for some reason, his heart was aching to see him in pain. Time passed by and Jeonghan finally woke up, “You should get some more sleep,” he said but Jeonghan had to go home.  
“Thank you for today, I’m sorry for the hassle. I’ll come back for the next checkup.” Jeonghan got up and hurriedly headed home, Seungcheol is about to be home in any minute now. 

He quietly opened the door of their house, Seungcheol isn’t here yet, good. He plopped down on the bed and drifted off to sleep once more. He dreamt of what his life could have been if he didn’t meet Seungcheol. It was easy going, his parents have accepted him and were proud of him for fulfilling his dream in becoming a doctor. He lived in a nice apartment with his favorite dog running around the room, he wished he could have that life. A life without Seungcheol. 

He was woken up by the heavy feeling on his chest just to see that it was Seungcheol hugging him. Too good, to be true, this must be a dream. He stroked his hair gently. “Jihoon,” Seungcheol mumbled in his sleep. Please let this be a dream. 

____________________________________________________________________________

“I’m impressed how much you’ve managed to keep everything a secret, Jeonghan,” It was Jeonghan’s second chemotherapy and was resting in his office once more. The velvet blanket was much better than the previous one he had during his first. Did he get another one for me? That’s because Seungcheol is barely at home, he just managed to make sure to not overlap their schedules and plan ahead, “Eat up while it’s still hot. I also haven’t eaten,”

“You’re too kind to me, Dr. Hong,” Jeonghan replied.  
“Joshua,” he smiled at him. Jeonghan looked at him confused, “You can drop the formalities, you can call me Joshua.”  
“Dr. Hong,” Joshua looked at him, “I mean, Joshua. Thank you so much.”

Joshua volunteered to take him home, the weather was colder than before, “Here take this, make sure to stay warm. Okay?” Joshua wrapped his scarf over Jeonghan, “Let’s get you home.” For the first time, Jeonghan finally smiled genuinely. 

“Thank you again, Joshua.” He waved goodbye and headed straight to his room. Seungcheol hasn’t been home for the past days and it was making him worry again. As much as possible, he didn’t want Seungcheol to see him get off in another man’s car or see him suffering from pain.

“Cheol? I miss you.” Jeonghan weakly said.  
Seungcheol was taken back by the sudden honesty of him, “I missed you too, you finally decided to call?”  
“I didn’t want to disturb your work, you might be busy.”  
“I’ll finish quickly so I can get to you.” Seungcheol answered but there was another faint voice on the other end of the line, “Cheol, come here please?” It was another man’s voice.  
“Okay. I’ll wait for you.” He ended the call.

Pain wasn’t the right word for it nor was suffering. Jeonghan looked at the winter sky and cried his heart out. The pain that he was carrying for so long has finally reached him and broke him to millions of pieces. There was no hope for him to heal and he doesn’t deserve another chance to live. The echoing voice inside him wanted to shout and wail out the agony that he has kept. He pleaded with the angels to take the pain away, to take him away. He could feel his heavy heart slowly giving out and his breathing was becoming unstable. 

I wished I was him. I wished I was with whoever you found comfort with. What did I lack? What was wrong with me for you to find someone else?

For how many days would Jeonghan cry for the same man that kept hurting him? No matter what fault he has done, why does he keep coming back? The tears didn’t stop pouring and he couldn’t see anymore, it was all faint light. One day he won’t be crying for this man. His hand was trying to find his phone, will he come back if he hears him crying in pain because of him?

“Seungcheol, I’m already about to die in pain. Please don’t abandon me, I’ll be good to you. Please. It hurts so much,” Jeonghan whimpered.  
“Jeonghan?! What’s wrong?”  
“It hurts so much, how could you keep hurting me?” He clutched his chest, wanting to stop his heart from aching.  
“Jeonghan, please, where are you?”  
“I’m at home. I’m always at home, I’m always waiting for you.”  
“I’ll be there, please wait for me, okay?” Joshua quickly turned his car and rushed to Jeonghan’s house. 

Joshua arrived at the scene of Jeonghan’s body scattered to the floor, he was barely breathing and his body was hot from the fever. It wasn’t his sickness that was making him cry. It was because of love, Joshua finally understood why he kept delaying his treatment. He didn’t want to stay. 

Jeonghan woke up on an unfamiliar bed, the blankets were thick and kept him warm throughout the night. The door suddenly burst open and came running was a medium-sized corgi full of energy. It hoped right into Jeonghan and was awaiting for him to give him pats to which Jeonghan gladly did. “Asher! Go down, don’t disturb our patient,” he motioned him to get out of the bed. Jeonghan laughed, it was the first time that Joshua has heard him laugh. 

“I don’t mind, I always wanted a dog but I wasn’t allowed to have one,” he remembered how Seungcheol was so strict at it that they almost broke up over some pet.  
“Well, that’s good to hear. Have some breakfast first then take your medicines, okay?” Jeonghan accepted the food and ate in delight, “Jeonghan, do you want to stay here for a while?” 

He almost choked on his food from the unexpected question, as much as he likes the kindness that Joshua has been offering him, he can’t leave his home, “Joshua, I really wished I could repay all the kindness you have been giving me but I can’t.”

“It’s because of him isn’t it?” He asked. Silence. “It’s okay. I understand, and you don’t have to repay any of this. I’m doing this because I like you, Jeonghan.”  
“What?” His eyes widened, Joshua just confessed to him, “You know I’m in a relationship, Joshua.”  
“I know, you don’t have to do anything. Just let me take care of you please? I want you to live longer, you deserve all the good things in life. And seeing you last night broke me.” He replied.

“Give me time, I’ll tell you when I finally have decided to leave.” 

Jeonghan spent the whole day playing with Asher at Joshua’s home, it warmed his heart to see him smile all day. He has been suffering for weeks all alone that it made his heart sting whenever he has to drop him home alone. If only he was years earlier, then maybe he’d find him earlier than Seungcheol. Maybe he could have tended his wounded heart. All he could do now is to hope and to believe that better days will come for Jeonghan for he didn’t deserve anymore of the pain he was suffering from, be it from his lover or his sickness, he deserves to be happy for once in his life. Was there a time in Jeonghan’s life that he was truly happy? Joshua wonders. 

“Hao, can you do me favor?” Joshua asked. Minghao was his college friend who graduated on top of his batch and earned him a guaranteed spot easily, “Investigate someone for me.”  
Minghao got intrigued immediately, has his friend finally found a lover that he ended up being obsessed with him? “What’s the name?” 

“Seungcheol.” 

Then a series of curses erupted from Minghao’s call, “Are you fucking nuts?! Why would I want to do that? Don’t you know that that man has power over me? Over you?!”  
He snickered in disgust, “Can you at least tell me who this man is?”  
Minghao chuckled, “A man full of power and a man who has a long list of men and women he casually hooks up with.” 

Joshua ended the call. Seungcheol has been screwing around while his lover is dying. Fucking hell.

Seungcheol was relaxing on their couch when Jeonghan had arrived home, “Where have you been?” He walked up and gave him a warm hug. 

“I went to the hospital for my checkup, I was sick last week, remember?” He kissed him on the cheek, wanting to ease the situation before he started to get angry at him. The kisses continued and gradually lowered down and headed down to their bed. “Hannie, I missed you so much,” he said in between the kisses as he slowly unbuttoned his shirt. He laid down on the bed and Seungcheol grabbed both of his hands so he won’t try to run away. Jeonghan quickly turned away from his kisses, “Close the lights first, please?” 

Seungcheol grunted, “I haven’t seen you in ages and you want to turn the lights off? I want to see your pretty face coming undone for me.” 

Jeonghan pleaded more, “Please. Turn off the lights, just this once.” Seungcheol got up and turned off the lights. He can’t let him see. 

____________________________________________________________________________

“Cheol, it’s cold,” Jeonghan snuggled to Cheol’s chest.  
He placed his hand over his forehead, “Your fever returned, your body has been weak these past weeks. I’ll stay home for you, let’s go to the hospital later.” Jeonghan whined like a baby, “I don’t want to, it’s hurting so much. My body aches so much,”  
“I guess we overdid it yesterday, we’ll go in another day,” he placed a kiss on his forehead.  
“Your phone keeps ringing, maybe you should go to work.” Jeonghan suggested, he needed to go to his appointment as well.  
“It’s okay, I told them I’ll be taking the day off for you.” And right on cue, Jihoon’s name popped up on Seungcheol’s phone. Jeonghan looked at him, waiting for him to answer but he shut off his phone, “Get some rest, I won’t leave you.” 

That’s what you said 10 years ago but you already left me. 

When Jeonghan woke up, Seungcheol was gone and left for work. He quickly dressed up and headed to the hospital for his next treatment. It was colder than ever but maybe it was just because of how his body hasn’t been coping well, he was too skinny and pale. 

“Joshua?” He knocked on the door, “I was also supposed to bring your scarf but I accidentally forgot to bring it with me.” 

He signaled him to take a seat, “How’s your condition?”  
“I’ve been coughing more blood lately and nose bleeds have been frequent. Sometimes after the treatment, I’d end up vomiting. I have also lost my appetite to eat and as you can see, I’ve lost weight.” Jeonghan recited. 

“Do you really not want to get confined? It’s better if you stay here so we could at least help you whenever you get those,”  
“My boyfriend would find out then and I don’t want that.” He refused once more, “But I can stay here for one more night. He’ll be back by tomorrow, at least I can recover some strength before facing him.”  
“I’ll bring you home tomorrow, get some rest.”

Whenever Jeonghan was away from his home, his sleep was always comforting and calming, there was no fear of Seungcheol and maybe it was really for the best to leave him. He put up with so much but why can’t he do the same for him? How much longer will he last?  
“You’ve been leaving the house lately without even telling me,” Seungcheol bickered, “Where have you been?!”  
Jeonghan jumped at the sudden shouting, he should have left the hospital earlier, “Why are you home? I thought you’d be at work.”  
“Just because I’m at work doesn’t mean you can go around and fling with your lovely doctor,” he glared, “Where’s your coat?” 

“Oh, I must have left it at the hospital.” He had no energy in arguing with him anymore.  
“Who owns that scarf?” He pointed at Joshua’s scarf, “I’m sure it isn’t yours and it reeked of another man,”  
“The doctor’s.”  
Seungcheol chuckled, “Your coat is at the hospital and that scarf belongs to the doctor. I can’t believe you’ll stoop so low. Fucking a cheap bastard,”  
“Choi Seungcheol! I did not fool around with any man unlike you! I put up with all your bullshit yet you treat me like this?! You’re no better than m-” Seungcheol slapped Jeonghan. It was much heavier than the previous slap he has given him. This one burns more. 

He took hold of Jeonghan, “You dare cheat on me with such a bastard? Fine. I’ll make sure you’ll be fucking afraid of being touched by another man.” 

______________________________________________________________________________

It was a cold night and Jeonghan was covered in his blood, “Han? You’re coughing up blood! Let’s get you to the hospital, please.” 

Seungcheol started panicking, was he too harsh on him earlier? He shouldn’t have too far if it would lead him to this. The bedsheets were covered in his blood and his clothes were dripping with crimson red. 

“Cold.” Jeonghan mumbled and Seungcheol placed the blanket, “Not going.” Seungcheol immediately called the family doctor.  
“He’ll be here soon, please take a nap first. I won’t let anything bad happen to you,”

“Cheol, I wish we could go back when we first met. You were such a handsome and kind boy who always loved following me around school. Everyday after school you’d invite me to come home together. You promised you'd take care of me, cherish me and love me with all of your heart and soul. When I was left alone by my parents because of their accident, I had nothing else but you so I stayed. I stayed until the very end until now but slowly, I’m losing hope. You know how much I’m afraid of pain but you slapped me without even thinking. You keep accusing me of having an affair when I’m so useless. I don’t have anything, I only have you. Yet you’re out there treating me like I deserve to die. You’re out there screwing around men and women who are much younger than me. Please tell me. Please tell me if you don’t want me anymore, because I know you don’t love me anymore.” Jeonghan cried in his arms. It hurts. 

Seungcheol held him tightly, he knew all along his affairs but still stayed with him, “I’m sorry. I’ll be good to you, it’s all my fault.”  
“How much longer can I stay without your love? Because I can’t anymore, Cheol.”  
“I love you so much, Han. Please, I’m sorry.” 

The doorbell rang and Seungcheol’s brother greeted him, “What took you so long?”  
“It’s a Saturday, Cheol,” Mingyu answered, “It was supposed to be my day off.”  
“Just check up on him.” 

Mingyu examined Jeonghan’s situation and to his concern, he had multiple injuries and bruises from his body. The last time he saw him, he was happy and was the most joyous person, how could that be the same person right now? He looked like he was on the edge of death and he has lost so much. 

“Cheol, do you even still love him?” Mingyu questioned, “Cause from the looks of it, you barely even take care of him. Do you even know he has coagulopathy? No wonder there’s so much blood.”  
(A/N: Coagulopathy is a condition in which the blood's ability to clot is impaired aka excessive bleeding)

Seungcheol looked down, his face full of shame and guilt, “I do. I really do.”  
“Then take care of him. Reflect on yourself for fuck’s sake.”  
“I will. I’m sorry,” he answered.  
“Do you have any medicines that he might be taking?”  
“It’s in the study room.”

He walked to the study room and found a dozen medicines sitting in the room. This looks familiar. What was it again? I’ll have to double check again and come back.  
“Did you get it?” Seungcheol asked. Mingyu hurried over to him, “Make sure he takes this. Help him when it comes to eating. Soup should be okay for now, he would have a harder time eating due to his condition, so please help him. I mean it.”  
“Alright, I got it.”  
“By the way, have you taken any medications? I saw them in the study room,”  
Seungcheol declined, “It’s Han’s I’ll ask him once he wakes up.”  
“Take care of him.” 

He walked up to their room and Jeonghan was in deep sleep. He was finally starting to feel the guilt and regrets of his doings but why does it have to become like this? Seeing Jeonghan asleep warmed his heart a little, at least he won’t feel any pain while he drifts off. He sat on his side and held his fragile hands, “You knew all along but stayed.” Seungcheol kissed his cheek, there were streams of his dried tears from the pain earlier. 

His tears started pouring down, he had hurt him more than ever and he couldn't bring himself for forgiveness, “I won’t do anything anymore to hurt you. Please forgive me. I promise you I’ll be with you, this time it’s for real.” 

______________________________________________________________________________

“Thank you for tuning in the morning ne-,” the television from the living room echoed through the room. Jeonghan struggled to keep his eyes awake, the sunlight was poking at him, “You’re awake, let’s go have breakfast,” Seungcheol exclaimed.

Jeonghan ignored him and started to stand up from his bed, “Hannie, I’m sorry. I know I went too far yesterday. Please forgive me.” He ignored him once more, “Jeonghan. Please, you can slap me or curse at me. Do whatever you want, please. Don’t be like this.” 

It was pathetic to hear his excuses, they were all stupid excuses to make sympathy for. Each word that comes out of his mouth was torture to him, he deserves more than what he has right now and he knows that this isn’t love anymore. They’ve been blinded by love that no matter what happened and no matter who gets hurt, they’d believe that it was alright because it was him that he loves. But love can’t solve everything. 

“I can barely stand up and you want me to slap you? I can barely talk and you want me to beg for an explanation?” Jeonghan couldn’t stand seeing him anymore, “It’s only been 10 years, I can still leave you.”  
Seungcheol grabbed his wrist, “Hannie, let’s talk about this okay? I’m sorry, please forgive me. I promise I’ll change, please?”  
“After fucking around and fucking playing with me, you dare expect I’d forgive you so easily?!” His voice was starting to sound rough and he was having trouble in speaking, “Leave. Get out of my fucking sight you asshole!” 

It was his first defeat, Seungcheol’s first defeat. He left the house dumbfounded, lost in his thoughts and regrets. If only he was good to him from until now it wouldn’t have come to this but all hell went loose and the devil spawned and played with him. He didn’t deserve Jeonghan, the moment he saw him on the brink of death, he knew he had lost hope. The agony of Jeonghan’s voice, telling him that he knows he doesn’t love him anymore burns deep in his wretched heart. It was all lies, he loves him unconditionally but why does he keep hurting him? Why does he keep making the same mistakes over and over again? What happens when everything will be too late for them? What happens when he finally loses Jeonghan? Jeonghan wouldn’t leave him, he won’t and he can’t, he thought. 

Seungcheol drank another shot, it’s past midnight and he had been downing one bottle to another and finally passed out on the cold table of a dine-in restaurant, “I’ll take care of him, don’t worry. Thank you!” the man happily replied. He supported Seungcheol and headed to their house. 

“What happened to you? You’re a mess, Cheol,” Ji took off his shirt to get him cleaned up, “Don’t even try to puke on the bed.”  
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.  
“It’s okay, I won’t get mad, I never get mad at you, silly.” Jihoon placed a kiss on his forehead.  
“I love you so much…”  
Jihoon blushed, “I love you too,”  
“Jeonghan.” 

Jihoon’s face was filled with disgust, it’s always Jeonghan that comes out of his mouth. What kind of a person is for Seungcheol to love him like this? Whenever they’d argue, Seungcheol would come knocking at his door and banging him til the night ends. What kind of lover is him? Jihoon hated him, he was the sole hindrance of his relationship with Seungcheol. 

Seungcheol groaned and woke up to see Jihoon’s naked body beside him. Fuck. He rapidly dressed up, waking Jihoon, “It’s too early, come back to bed.” 

“Tell my assistant to give you a manager position once you go to the company. Take whatever you want and say the amount, I don’t care how much it is just don’t ever contact me again. I’m leaving.” Seungcheol ordered.  
“You can’t just leave me like that! What do you think I am?!”  
“You’re just a fling. Now be good and don’t contact me again.”  
“Cheollie! Please, I’ll do everything you want. I’ll change, don’t leave like this!” Jihoon shouted across the room.  
“I said, we’re over.” Seungcheol left and headed to his company. Jihoon was furious from the sudden breakup, he clenched his fist and started throwing the pillows on his bed and was shouting on top of his lungs. This is all Jeonghan’s fault. Jihoon picked himself up and decided he would have a heart to heart talk with this so-called lover of his Seungcheol.

Seungcheol left last night and hasn't come back home, the quietness helped him feel at ease. Whenever Seungcheol was at home, the room was either filled with anger or lust, nothing in between, he couldn’t even remember how long it was since he actually felt genuine love from him. The doorbell rang, it must be him. 

But to his surprise, it was someone else, “Hi, I’m Lee Jihoon, can I speak with you?” There’s a part of him that wanted to slam the door and leave him be, he doesn’t need another problem to deal with, “Come in.”  
The room was filled with tension and he didn’t dare say another word at him, he was still recovering from slashing out last night. “Leave Seungcheol,” those were his first words to him. Jeonghan giggled, “No matter how much I ask him to leave me, he never does.” 

“But he sure can leave 10 years of love behind, just like his ring.” He smirked at him, “I still have it if you want to get it back, we could meet sometime and I’ll be glad to give the ring back. He threw it aside just like his love for you.”  
“Get out.” 

Jihoon had triggered him already and got what he came for and left. As soon as the doors slammed, Jeonghan cried again in pain, blood was coming out as he started coughing for air. 

“Joshua. Stop the treatment.” He texted him. He doesn’t want to live anymore. The love that he tried to hold on to was merely nothing to Seungcheol. The spark of joy whenever they were together has finally faded. He looked at his ring, it was his most prized possession but it was just a joke to him. 

The doors opened once more and Seungcheol waltzed into the room holding the most beautiful Hibiscus flowers he had seen, “You’re back!” he forced a smile. Seungcheol was taken back by the sudden happiness but didn’t mind so, “I missed you. Are these flowers for me?” 

“Of course it is,” Seungcheol smiled at him. Jeonghan took the bouquet, flashing his hand at him for him to notice he took off the ring, “Hannie, where’s your ring?” He nervously asked.  
“I must have lost it, don’t worry about it,” he beamed.  
“Han, stop playing jokes, please.”  
“At least I didn’t throw it away like yours.” There really is no future for us, Cheol. 

______________________________________________________________________________

“Hannie, I’ll be off to work now. Get showered and eat your breakfast okay?” Jeonghan nodded.  
“Come back early.” 

Jeonghan browsed through his phone and received dozens of calls and messages from Joshua. He’s not ready for another lecture but he did grow a soft spot for him, whenever he feels sad he’d always go to the hospital to chat with him. He kept him company so he wasn’t suffering alone and respected him in every way possible. He dialed his number and on the first ring, he picked up immediately, “Jeonghan! What do you mean you’ll stop getting treated?! Are you out of your mind?! Where have you been these past couple of days?! I’ve been messaging you and calling you but you won’t answer!” Joshua was panicking on the other side of the call, he could hear his heavy breathing and fast paced words coming out of him in every second. 

“I’m sorry, Joshua. I’ll be stopping my chemotherapy.” Jeonghan proclaimed, there was no use of getting treated anymore.  
Joshua tried to gather his words, “Where are you? Let’s talk, please. Don’t waste your life like this!”  
“Joshua, I’m ready to leave.” He picked up his car keys and prepared for Jeonghan’s end, “Okay, I’ll pick you up.” 

Jeonghan silently packed a one week worth of clothes, bid farewell to his home, no, it wasn’t home anymore. He closed the door of their house, leaving everything behind including his ring. Remembering how he asked Seungcheol to not make him leave for he won’t be with him anymore and now here he is, leaving him behind to spend the few remaining days of his life, alone. He’d rather spend it somewhere peaceful and quiet rather than dying beside the man who claimed he has loved him. 

He stayed in a provincial area, there were barely any people but he liked that. It was a small house, just perfect for him. Joshua decided to stay with him, he has brought Asher since Jeonghan said that he always wanted to have a dog of his own. Watching the village’s view, winter was gradually leaving and spring will be here in a while, in spring he shall leave. 

The first day was the toughest for him, he was coughing more blood and had no strength to even walk, Joshua said it must be the result of the emotional pain he was carrying, “Stay here and get some sleep. That’s all I ask for you,” his voice breaking as he placed a kiss on his forehead. Jeonghan touched the part where he kissed him, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.”

Jeonghan smiled, “It’s okay, I don’t mind at all.”  
“I’ll bring you some tea then we can talk about anything else you want, okay?” He got up and prepared some tea. Within this week, I’d be able to win Jeonghan over and watch him leave this world, Joshua thought. It pained him but knowing that Jeonghan trusted him enough to be with him till his final days, he didn't mind. A little bit of hope has convinced him that maybe, just maybe, Jeonghan was slowly healing with him. 

“Here’s your tea,” Joshua handed him the tiny cup. It smelled sweet just like the flowers that Seungcheol has brought him, hibiscus.  
“It smells like hibiscus,” he pointed out.  
“It is hibiscus tea, do you not like it? I can get you another one.”  
“No, it’s okay. They’re my favorite,” he beamed, “Winter is finally coming to an end.”  
Joshua sat beside him on the bed, “That means you won’t be that cold anymore and you could finally see the flowers bloom,”  
“If I make it,”

Joshua’s eyebrows furrowed, he placed a hand on his cheek, it was cold and pale and he felt like his body could give out in any minute if it wasn’t taken care of immediately, “You have to, not until the flowers bloom.” 

He smiled at him, Joshua has been good to him ever since, “In another lifetime, I hope you can meet me earlier. I really wish I could give back everything you’ve done for me,” he said, “Maybe I wouldn’t suffer this much, maybe I’d actually feel what it was like to be loved truly.” 

“Jeonghan, stop thinking about that. I’ll be here for you, I’ve always said this but I’ll never get tired of saying it to you. Let me take care and love you until the end.” Joshua reached out to hold his hand and Jeonghan accepted, “Get some rest, I’ll wake you up once dinner is ready.” 

Jeonghan had trouble in sleeping, he kept turning around the bed due to the unusual comfort, he missed his house but there was no use of going back. It brings back all the memories of suffering and pain that he encountered there. When Seungcheol first brought their house, it was filled with happiness and joy and Jeonghan had decided he wouldn’t trade anything for that, he loved his home. 

He stared at the ceiling of the room, wondering if Seungcheol was already home and was trashing the house since he had left. He wonders if he’d look for him or just fling with Jihoon, he was younger than him and maybe Seungcheol liked that more. He was all sticks and bones due to his sickness, maybe Seungcheol had grown tired of him. 

His hand felt lighter, he missed the ring that was silently sitting on his finger. How could he throw away the 10 years that they had? Jeonghan had the toughest years of his life trying to endure the pain that he had kept yet Seungcheol could easily smile and wipe it off easily. Life was unfair to the kind. He drifted off to sleep after the silent tears flooded his sight. 

Seungcheol rummaged throughout the house and looked for Jeonghan, it was empty. “Jeonghan!” He shouted, “Jeonghan, where are you?!” He kept on calling his number but Jeonghan has already left his phone in the house along with his ring. Seungcheol’s tears dropped as he held Jeonghan's ring, he really has left. Come back early. Or you’ll miss me forever.

His phone suddenly rang and Jihoon’s name flashed on the screen. What the fuck does this bastard want? He accepted the call and Jihoon’s beaming voice echoed through the other end of the call, “Cheollie! When are you coming home? I miss you so much,”  
“I’m not fucking coming back. How many times do I have to tell you?” Seungcheol snapped.  
“Don’t be like that Cheollie, I already got rid of him, there’s no need to be angry.” 

Seungcheol’s eyes widened, his fist clenched and his blood was starting to boil from the annoying voice of his, “I’m coming.” Did he leave because of Jihoon? What did Jihoon say for him to leave him? He held the ring tightly, it was the last piece of Jeonghan that was left with him. 

“Cheollie! You’re here!” Jihoon tried to give him a hug but was pushed away immediately.  
“Did you talk to Jeonghan?” He asked.  
Jihoon’s scared face gave away the answer, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”  
“I told you, I do not fucking love you. I have someone in my heart and it isn’t you.”  
“Cheol, I’m sorry, please. I won’t do it again, I promise I’ll be good,” he held out his hand to stop him from leaving and Seungchol grabbed his wrist, “My ring.”  
“I’m sorry, I was just curious and took it out, I was going to give it to you.”  
“Just stop. Stop ruining my life.” Seungcheol said as he took his ring away from him.

Seungcheol went home with a heavy heart, he could barely stand up from the exhausting pain that he has felt ever since Jeonghan left. Where did he go? He couldn’t have gone that far, right? Maybe his doctor knows, I’m losing hope. 

______________________________________________________________________________

“Mingyu?” Seungcheol looked up to his brother who was waiting outside his house, “I have bad news for you.” Mingyu immediately rushed when he realized what was going on. It wasn’t just excessive bleeding, there was so much more and he blamed himself for not being able to recognize it.  
“Let’s talk inside,” he opened the empty house, it stings that Jeonghan wasn’t with him, it didn’t feel like home anymore. Jeonghan would always greet him and give him the best hugs.  
“Where’s Jeonghan?” Mingyu asked, his face was full of worry and anxiety.  
Seungcheol sat down on their coach and replied, “He left. I don’t know where he went and I’ve been searching for him.” 

Mingyu threw a punch at his brother, it was fast but not enough to bruise him, it hurts. Seungcheol groaned at the sudden punch, it felt like a slap. The medicines that he first saw in the study room made sense and Seungcheol didn’t even know that he was about to lose him. 

“I asked you before if you love him and you said yes,” Mingyu looked at him with disgust, “But you can’t even take care of him nor know what state he is in.”  
“What’s wrong with you?! What are you talking about?!” Seungcheol stood up to face his brother. 

“Haven’t you realized? Whenever you’re screwing around, he might be doing chemotherapy? Whenever you accuse him of having an affair with the doctor, he might be suffering from the after effects?! Whenever he begs you to close the lights, that’s because he doesn’t want you to see the injections and bruises on his body?!” Mingyu screamed at him, “Didn’t you even bother to check how long he was taking the medicines? What were the medicines for?! Did you even really fucking love him?!” 

Seungcheol’s thoughts were out of control, “What’s happening to him?” Mingyu turned away at him, unable to say, “Mingyu, what’s wrong with Jeonghan?”

“Leukemia. He’s at his final stage.” 

Seungcheol and Mingyu went to the hospital first thing. There was barely any snow left and the sun was shining brightly but it burned Seungcheol’s sight, “I want to find him, please. Do everything you can to find him,” he cried out. He was selfish and even if he asked the gods above, none of them would grant his wish. No god will help save his Jeonghan and it was all his fault. It’s been going on for months and he didn’t even realize, he abused him for so long but Jeonghan still managed to hide everything and smile at him like he’s the best thing in the world for him. 

“Cheol, stop it. You’re embarrassing yourself in public, we’ll find him.” Mingyu helped him get on his feet, Seungcheol has been on his knees and gripping Jeonghan’s medical records. 

“I want to say sorry and to change for him. I want to eat yeot with him again in the first winter.” He confessed, “It’s the first winter, are you coming home? I could cook us some yeot,” that’s because he won’t make it next winter, Cheol. “It’s okay, it was a cheap ring anyways. Eat up,” that’s because you won’t get to see him wear it anymore, Cheol. “I stayed.” That's because he knew he'd be leaving soon. 

Mingyu felt sorry for his brother, but there was nothing else they could do, “Rest up. I’ll give you a call once we’ve heard any news about him, okay?” Seungcheol nodded and headed home. He wants to see him again and ask for forgiveness, he tortured him and played with him over and over again. How lonely was it to bear all the pain alone. Cruel. “I want him back.” 

______________________________________________________________________________

“Jeonghan! I told you to stay inside, it’s still cold, it’s not good for your body.” Joshua draped over a thick coat for him.  
“Asher wanted to play a bit and I just accompanied him,” he smiled. Jeonghan has been smiling for the past few days since he left their house. It warmed his heart, “Let’s take a walk at the garden,” Jeonghan said as he placed a kiss on his cheek making Joshua flustered.

It was a simple garden filled with the most beautiful flowers that Jeonghan has ever seen but too bad it hasn’t bloomed yet, “They’re waiting for you for them to bloom, so please last long.” Joshua said to help Jeonghan realized that it wasn’t his time yet to go. 

“Joshua, did anyone call you yet?” He asked. Seungcheol must have been found out by now, it’s been 2 days since he has left. Joshua fidget in his place, not wanting to answer Jeonghan, “Well, Minghao called and asked if I knew where you were. Apparently your lover has been looking all over you,”  
“He’s not my lover anymore,” Jeonghan reminded him, “So he found out about my condition then?”  
“Yeah, he demanded the hospital to give your records to him an-,”  
“That means he knows I’ll be dying soon.”  
“Jeonghan,”  
“It’s okay.” Jeonghan looked at the sky above him, winter was finally ending. “Let’s go inside. If he knows, he’ll be here in any minute.”

When Joshua first met Jeonghan, he was all alone sitting in the corridor of the hospital, wearing the puffiest coat to warm his body from the cold winter. His eyes were drooping down the concrete floor and his hands were held together to keep himself warm. His first thought was how lonely it was to endure the pain alone and in that moment he had fallen in love with this man. Every checkup he went to, he was by himself and it disturbed him why he had to suffer such consequences, but when he saw the ring he wore, he realized it was because he truly loved his partner to not tell him. 

He didn’t want to suffer any hardships alone but didn’t tell his partner, what for? The call of distress showed him the answer, it wasn’t because he didn’t want to but because he can’t. Seungcheol was cheating on him while Jeonghan was barely surviving. If only he had come earlier, he could have taken Jeonghan away. How despicable for Seungcheol to fool around and bat an eye at his condition. Joshua curses that Seungcheol would regret everything he did to him. 

He wished he could have carried the burden that Jeonghan was facing, he wished he could have convinced him more that there was a chance, but Jeonghan would have shushed him. Saying how in his state, that the probability of living was down to zero. 

“Joshua? What’s wrong?” He questioned, “Just thinking how lucky I am to get to spend your days with you.” 

They were sitting beside the window with Asher beside him, Jeonghan was cozying up at Joshua’s chest and both of them knew it’s almost time, “Thank you so much for taking care of me this past few days. You’ve always been with me even when I was so stubborn in getting my treatment. You were the only person who made me feel like I did deserve another chance in life. I promised you it will be for a week and I’d wait for the flowers to bloom but it seems like I can’t fulfill that.”

“Han,” he whispered, “I love you so much. I love you so much, it hurts seeing you like this. Please.” 

His heart was weakening and he had no strength left in him. The beautiful horizon stretched out beyond his sight, the white clouds of hope had started appearing and he couldn't wait to see past the brutal winter. He always loved winter ever since he was a child, he would play with his parents in their backyard and make snow angels. He’d run around and Seungcheol would chase him down as they dive in the mountains of snow at their house. They’d share a warm cup of hot chocolate and just hold each other in a warm embrace. Sharing their favorite yeot and wishing for luck to come. 

But happy endings don’t exist, as he grew up, he found himself distanced from everything that he has loved. He was starting to hate how Seungcheol would touch him, he reeked of alcohol and another man. The snow was wicked to his body and he despised the touch of it on him, so he coped up inside his house all winter long as his body gave away. 

The 10 years he has loved Seungcheol, he hated it. He hated how he couldn’t leave him because he loved him. He loved him so much that he lost himself in the end. 

Jeonghan shivered, it was getting colder, “Cold. It’s cold.” Joshua hurriedly placed another layer of blanket on him, tears were running down his cheeks, “It hurts.”  
“Where does it hurt? Do you want me to take you to the hospital?” Joshua panicked.  
Jeonghan placed his hand to his chest, “It hurts here.” He delicately touched his heart, “Have you seen my ring? I need my ring,” he mumbled. No matter what happens, he’d always leave a trace in Jeonghan’s heart. 

Unexpectedly, Joshua heard the doors open and the sound of the man calling out Jeonghan’s name. He wanted to escape and take Jeonghan away once more but in Jeonghan’s condition, it was impossible. He had warned him that Seungcheol would have found them by now. Each door was bursting open and his walk was getting nearer to their room, he nervously grew quickly and panicked filled his face. He held Jeonghan’s body closer to his, “Jeonghan, the flowers are about to bloom tomorrow, please stay.” Joshua cried out. 

Seungcheol walked to the room to see Jeonghan’s weak body looking at the view, walking closely his tears were dripping down his cheeks. He looked like he had not been eating nor sleeping the past few days from searching for him. Joshua motioned him to come closer, as much as he hated it, he wasn’t an evil person who’d be selfish, he isn’t like Seungcheol. He moved closer, both of them holding the fragile body of Jeonghan, both men were shedding tears and hearts were aching.

He has been suffering all alone from most of his life and to see both men that have loved him beg him to continue living that it hurts him. But he knew that life wasn’t worth having a second chance the day the first snowfall came to him. The agony that he has faced is finally coming to an end, no matter what happens, his mind was set and he wishes to continue on. The snow in the cold concrete was melting away and the sun was shining brightly at him. He should have felt the warmth of the sun but instead he felt nothing but the cold and emptiness of himself. 

He lost all hope he had, he gave all the luck he had and he has accepted his fate.  
Jeonghan held both of their hands, closed his eyes and whispered his final words.

“After winter, let’s go home together.”

**Author's Note:**

> aaaaa thank you for reading! this is my first time in writing a slow burn one shot! i hope u like it :D


End file.
